This is my 300th post. Can you believe it? Three hundred. For three hundred days, I have graced you with the biggest amount of bullshit one can dish out. And you still come back and still tell friends and I am amazed that I seriously have anything insightful to say which most days I don't. But like throwing a little dog a lamb chop, you understand my madness and to say I am grateful is an understatement. So with this big whopper of a post I thought I would give you another installment of Bleep Dusty Says. The last one I labeled "Shit Dusty Says" and like my milkshake it brought all the weirdo's to da yard. So here we go!
Someone asked me what I wanted for Christmas and my answer was, "I looked in the Sears Christmas catalog and I don't see where you can order Carrie Underwood's legs. The catalog is a rip off."
After expressing my opinion on why I unfollowed another blogger because of a racist tweet, I summed it up by saying, "well, I couldn't handle her trailer park roots, she gave new meaning to ombre."
A co-worker called to see if any of our guys in the office participated in Movember. I said, "I found it discriminatory but I participated anyway. I seriously dulled my razor after one leg. The hair was so long I am sure the tattoo of my son's same started to include other letters of the alphabet."
We have two guys in our office named Joe. We refer to one as Asian Joe. Someone called for him and I was like huh? She said his first name which is something sorta unpronouncable. I said, "oh, yeah, that's Asian Joe." She said, "what part of Asian is he from?" I said, "hell if I know, somewhere with rice."
"I don't care if my asshole grows bear fur, I will never getting another Brazillian wax again!" That was a convo about anal bleaching. Yeah, one thing led to another.
So, there ya have it. I know three hundred posts and that's all I got. I can tell you while I am typing this my dog just farted and it seriously stinks so bad, that if you want me to post 301 times, I must clear out. She's 14, her butt and breath both have the same scent.
Shoot the confetti and blow the horns,